AUTUMN '23 
'NEWS VIEWS & SCREWS'
ESCORT LIFESTYLE MAGAZINE

Fun50Couple-NEWS

Hello Sexy Friends! How are we all doing? As best as can be expected we hope in these troubling times. Rain's lashing down on the back windows & the first strong winds of Autumn are blowing up here in the North East, not that we've had a summer, save for two glorious days recently on the beach at Seaton (the nude end obviously). Business has been holding up surprisingly well, not least because we keep investing in quality kit & new experiences for our valued clients! Oh! So you've not seen us yet? 🙂 What happened to those long forgotten New Year Resolutions, you know, the ones like visiting a couple for hot no holes barred sex, or exploring your bi-curious side perhaps? Ha!

So, I'm buzzing right now with excitement, anger, some trepidation, and HOPE. Hope as it manifests itself in the economy (Housing>new Orders>Profits>unEmployment, if you're a trader or investor you'll know what I'm on about) and hope with regard to the future direction of our kinky lifestyle. The big news this issue is our latest piece of equipment, a SeriousKit milker. What's interesting about the purchase, and me writing NEWS VIEWS & SCREWS, is everything's intertwined. One doesn't go out and blow a couple of grand on what's essentially a sex toy, without a decent amount of research, discussion & thought. Longtime subscribers will know we've had our doubts for some time as to younger generations' attitudes towards skin on skin sex, also whether sexual liberation is a 'fait accompli'. In addition, there's growing evidence of GovUK's intention to shut down free speech on the internet. Those perceptions are turning out to be well founded.

A couple of grand to a lot of people these days is peanuts we know, but NOT TO US! We've got multiple clients who spend double that umpteen times a year on holidays! But the milking machine on its own is just the start. SeriousKit manufacture a range of suction devices from basic tubes (SPH's) to electro tubes, perinium & testicle suckers, nipple stimulators, rubber pants incorporating electro anal plugs & masturbation bags, not to mention full rubber suits costing upward of four thousand apiece. So guys, we're at the beginning of ANOTHER exciting journey, furthering our knowledge & experience of heavy KINK. Quick note: if you're reading this & worried we might be too FULL ON, fear not, we're just as happy introducing a nervous newbie to three-way sex as we are conducting an extreme four hour double dom(me) session; We're interested in both, but from a business POV it makes more sense to concentrate on the BDSM side. We'd started with the Darlington Dungeon, then there was a wee blip after we sold it, now we're marching forward again, building back better (HUH!?!?)

We wondered if portable milking machines (so called) might affect potential custom. I was surprised by the extent this sector of the pleasure product market has exploded, in just the last couple of years. A large part of the surge in popularity can be attributed to many men's reluctance to meet others for sex in person aka #FearFactor & #StayingSafe due to what we were told about Covid. I'd been away from the sharp end of sex toy retail for around four years, so what started out as 'fleshlights' (a sex toy used to replicate a vagina) has now progressed to full blown virtual sex where a user dons a hood and interacts with a synched video. This means he can select a favourite 'stroke' setting on his machine, insert his dick, and the gadget will wank him in synch with the thrusting depicted in the video he's watching. These aren't cheap either, with several of them costing upwards of two or three hundred pounds; there are security issues with them too... basically you're exposing the world wide web to your wanking habit, PLUS there are fees to pay, so you need login & credit card credentials etc etc. I suppose Millennials & under aren't really phased by that; TBF its a Millennial's Dream... a demographic famous for 'only paying for what they need' who struggle with verbal communication. Something like Kiiroo-Keon might tick a lot of boxes: You can #StayHome #StaySafe even work from home (#WFH), there's no voice communication skills required, AND you can get off in six and a half minutes feeling as if some-one else is blowing your dick. It's two hundred & fifty quid a pop, excluding VR access. I looked at nearly 20 of these things, mostly on sex toy reviewer sites..... flakey at the best of times, especially when you realise most of them are tied into affiliate marketing, something WE DON'T EVER SUSBSCRIBE to at NVS! None of them mentioned SeriousKit which is not overly surprising, because 1) it's way out of their league in terms of quality, performance & price, and 2) the company doesn't go out of its way to advertise. They don't have to, having gained a solid reputation within the closed kink community over 21+ years as the ultimate penis milking machine. Sadly there are now counterfeiters, churning out copies adorned with multi coloured bling; the same crowd who have ripped off Fetters, and in part responsible for said firm having to 'draw their horns in'. Local Authority (Warwick) overreach was another factor by all accounts 🙁 . So it took a fair while to decide on whether to invest or not. We knew that owning & offering one of their units to clients would elevate us to another level; a worthy addition to our arsenal of 'implements'. But the one thing that separated SeriousKit from anything else seen on the comparison sites was the element of 'control'. You don't have that option, Mistress or Master does. It's an industrial strength vacuum device, based on the Texas milking machine, yep, for COWS/DAIRY INDUSTRY, so you'd better be sure that whoever operates it knows what they're doing... to the point of CNC in some cases...in other words making you cum, and cum, and cum again even after you reckon you're 'done'. I'm referring to TRUST... the foundation of everything BDSM.

If you're paying attention, you'll notice I dropped the abbreviation 'CNC' in there. AKA Consensual Non Consent. I'll probably get a knock on the door from the thought police under orders from Dame Caroline Dinenage, chair of the Culture, Media and Sport Committee. (interestingly, the woman's father-in-law taught me as a school kid) She's wasted no time wielding a heavy hand, implementing the government's newly passed Online Safety Bill. Check out this story about Russell Brand. We warned you about this bill in NVS years ago;  expect to see complete removal of porn from UK social media, roadblocks set against you as a punter, even your private messages now at risk of government censorship (they always have been, GCHQ et al, now they don't even hide it). The Brand story has blown up this past couple of weeks....(as has Lawrence Fox/Ava Evans since) basically it's all about government shutting down dissent, & the vehicle they're using is the Online Safety Bill in confluence (they hope) with modern thinking, especially by Gen Z's. Read more...

I've mentioned in the past, blogging/online publishing means you open all sorts of cans, the younger ones use that annoying term 'rabbit holes' UGHHHHH! Meaning you research one topic and feel bound to follow links to a thousand related pages, digging deeper & deeper. You may recall me questioning a few issues back whether hard won sexual liberties might soon be in jeopardy? Like me, you've probably watched the whole trans/LGBT Pride thing spiral out of control. As an NVS subscriber you're undoubtedly a sexually enlightened soul. You may be bi-curious, bisexual, a cross dresser or a kinkster. You may be none of those things. Yet. But you know you want to broaden your horizons & to (s)explore. Its the same with same sex marriage (illegal in most countries still)... you likely agree or at least accept it, but you don't want it, or need it, ramming down your throat. This 'phenomena' we're witnessing and trying to live through, is known as Critical Social Justice. It's a movement far removed from Liberal Social Justice, something Western Societies had embraced this past four decades or so; a gradual easing up of long held taboos, supported & promoted by feminists & progressive bloggers, a more 'live & let live' approach. Critical Social Justice seeks to tear down 'enlightenment', to destroy so much of what we hold dear, it's behind everything 'woke' and its become a kind of cult. Worse, it's ensnared at least 50% of Western Politics. I'd say more like 70% because it's infecting even right of centre now, too. It's a subject you'd do well to research yourself, IF you're concerned or puzzled as to how we've got to where we are today. And as a potential consumer of 'personal services', you've every reason to be concerned. Because the pendulum's swinging, FAST. Gen Z, like the anti-porn feminists before them in the 70s and 80s, is a sex-negative generation. We've pondered over this for 4 for 5 years, and said as much in previous pages. Now it seems it's confirmed. Increasing numbers of Gen-Zs, a generation raised in a somewhat sex-saturated environment, are also increasingly sexless. They're saying the concept of sex positivity is outdated, harmful even. Studies suggest 30% of this group don't want and aren't having sex. There's a new(ish) term out there...'Pureteen'... holier than thou adolescents who proclaim to have turned full circle against 'sex positivity'. In the UK we've got people like Louise Perry, an activist opposed to sexual violence, whos' on record as saying: '[Sex-positive] ideology liquefies all norms, leaving only the principle of consent, and then insists that every consensual sexual act is necessarily good, refusing to recognize that consent is not binary. It is often subtly coerced, to varying degrees.”

Perhaps now, you can see the quandary as sexual service providers we find ourselves in, particularly with regard to replacing the Darlington dungeon. Millennials are iffy at best. Gen-Z increasingly are shunning sex. Generation Alpha (2010 on) likely will be pureteens/back to the 50's/sex only in marriage B.O.R.I.N.G.
So we're left with good old Gen-X starting at age 45/46, Boomers & a few Silent Generation to play with. A dwindling demographic. Granted we've got 15-20 years of punters in diminishing numbers; and there will be some GenZ's & Millennials who won't follow the fold, but broadly speaking we're on a downward trajectory. And that's before you throw another spanner in the works like doing away with cash and anonymous payments. It appears we may also be approaching (quite rapidly) a very brief period similar to the Roaring 20's, likely to be followed by another Great Depression...the ducks are lining up, you just gotta follow the charts & ignore the constant NOISE (easier said than done). We've got our 'thoughts'; stay tuned over the following months & years, we REALLY VALUE YOU as a subscriber, and hopefully a client. Always bear in mind, life's short it really is, & you definitely don't wanna risk getting old, forever wondering & thinking 'coulda woulda shoulda' 🙁

Later life, which many people think (not us I hasten to add) means anyone over 50, brings other challenges. Not least in the erection department...more on that later. (keep reading because I've found some fascinating information recently, meaning you probably don't have ED at all). You'll be pleased to know, that SeriousKit milker works even on flaccid penises, so if you have trouble getting it up due to, for example, medical issues like diabetes, or you have true ED, there's a good chance SeriousKit milker will bring you to orgasm. We've got a range of suction tubes between 30 & 50mm OD, so provided we can get a firm seal, you'll be good to go. But what does it really feel like I hear you ask? Well you'll have to cum and find out for yourself. Call Minx now! There's no time like the present. 07981-726237 We're still learning the nuances and fine tuning, but its a bit like electro-stimulation in that its not the same for everyone. One guy it didn't work on...he was way too small; we've since ordered additional tubes. Another guy (me) isn't sure to this day whether he came or peed or both...it was SO-OOOOOOOOO deliciously INTENSE; Popping you in the sling suspended from the bondage bed means you're able to rock & accentuate the sensation; it's well capable of delivering some of the best edging experiences known to man. The milker itself is a base unit which connects to literally scores of other attachments developed by the firm. We'll let you know when we add more tubes, hand pumps, probes & eventually, full vacuum suits. So guys, come try.

Fun50Couple-VIEWS

Although there's a ton of FUN associated with our kinky vocation & trading name, truth is, we run things like its a business. We have to, to stay successful and keep the pennies coming in. Repeat business is crucial, especially in hard times, so we constantly educate ourselves in an effort to satisfy more clients and address their needs. Recently I've been wading though a bundle of books, running to thousands of pages, in subjects surrounding sex after grief, sex in relation to cancer & Alzheimer's, & Sex for Over Fifties. As a professional escort couple delivering a SERVICE to Gen-X & older, we believe its advantageous to know about these things, to study them, so we can best empathize, deliver and hopefully EXCEED expectations. We've a 220+ positive feedback rating on AdultWork so we must be doing something right, but that doesn't mean we can be complacent.

You've heard of erectile dysfunction or 'ED', right? And if you're having trouble 'getting it up' you're maybe attributing it to that, especially if you've not sought medical advice. Inability to get fully hard isn't exactly uncommon for men, but if it happens more than 50% of the time, you'd likely be clinically diagnosed as having erectile dysfunction. Around 50% of men affected won't go to their GP & seek advice, too shy/feel silly etc but you really should if you're experiencing a drop off in performance. Having said that, the sad fact is, if you're over fifty, things DO start to go downhill, same for women too. But let's not get ahead of ourselves. Morning glory/wood, sometimes when you awaken, other times it wakens you....that's your body subconsciously going though a checklist...hard & horny means you're functioning and firing on all cylinders in the reproductory department. If that's not happening, its an amber light. True ED is almost always down to a medical problem, often connected to reduced blood flow through the arteries. That may be caused by numerous ills, including cardio-vascular disease, diabetes, testosterone deficiency, high fat diet, lazy lifestyle, stress, anxiety & more.

See a GP (that is IF you can get past the gatekeepers & land an appointment) He or she will examine you, send you for tests & may even prescribe Viagra or an equivalent like Sildenafil on the NHS . Even those, unless you're stimulated sexually, won't work. Nor will they work on top of heavy meals or alcohol. Another reason such 'medications' don't have any effect is if you're bypassed your doctor & bought online. A study in America revealed 50% of the pills sold were fakes, so beware. Here in the UK, we know clients who've regularly ordered from a company called MedExpress without any problems for years. (not medical advice I hasten to add!) #JustSaying #SharingIsCaring Click image to #LearnMore

Only a small percentage of men aged 45-60 have true ED. Even over 60, it doesn't affect large numbers. When men can't get hard, a lot of them feel shame & withdraw from sex altogether. It's a slippery slope. All kinds of emotional & relationship problems start to surface...many of which could have been avoided had they talked to doctors or spouses. Men will be men though! The really GOOD NEWS is, you may not be suffering from ED at all! Instead you may have EDis. What? EDis stands for Erectile Dissatisfaction. Like I said before, at around age 50, things change. More intense manual stimulation is needed to get fully erect & you may no longer get those instant erections when you see something hot, OR when you fantasize. As we age, we have to change our approach, both women AND men. It really is a case of USING it or LOSING it. Tell most women that & they think you're having a laugh, trying to coerce them into sex, but its a fact. Sex therapists reckon healthy men need to get hard for an extended period of time, 10 to 15 minutes or so, at least three times a week. Getting hard means the blood fills all those arteries & little veins in the penis which go to make that SOLID MEMBER, that rod of iron you yearn for and almost certainly took for granted in days past. Neglect it, & those spaces diminish. Your dick changes in shape and in some cases starts to reduce in size. If you want proof, just look at what happens in reverse...when sissy-bois go into prolonged chastity. Their aim is to reduce their dick to the size of a big clitoris and over years it works, with the penis shrinking within itself, unable to fill normally, it adapts to what it's been trained to do...wither.

So basically guys, if you're mid life or older, you're going to have to put some EXTRA effort in if you wanna maintain sexual prowess. Failing that, you're going to have to mentally get over it, and rethink how you're going to stimulate women so you BOTH get off and have a good time. What most men don't know, is that only around 25% of women are consistently orgasmic during vaginal intercourse. Penis size, staying power & duration, the feelings a woman might have for the man, none of those things count for a lot according to most women... that statistic comes from a comprehensive analysis of 33 studies over the past 80 years, by Elizabeth Lloyd, in her best selling book 'The Case Of The Female Orgasm' (Harvard 2005)

So many men are hung up on the macho thing. They think hard vaginal intercourse is the be all and end all... they watch too much porn & think they have to emulate what they've seen. We see how they act when they visit, some of  'em anyway.... rough fingering, no finesse or empathy, fumbling with condoms, then giving up, frustrated as their cock shrinks, after which comes the excuses... 'Awe, I never use condoms', or  worse 'I hate condoms can't we go on without one?' NO NO & NO!!  Sometimes they're with us because their wives have given up on them... painful intercourse for women over 50 is common, due to shrinking of the vaginal wall. Men need to wise up on female stimulation & effective communication. They need to get used to the idea that to maintain a healthy heterosexual relationship, they're going to have to change direction.  Learn to enjoy sex without intercourse.....teach yourself how to cum without being hard....YES you can... so many men don't know that. Take some of those things on board, train, & you may find 'the other half' more receptive, and even more surprisingly, you may find you get rock solid without even trying, just from extended foreplay. In days past, it might have been a case of 'striking while the iron was hot' IE sex on demand/spontaneity. In later life it's often more beneficial, especially for partners, to schedule a time & place in advance, when & where you're going to have sex. Allow yourselves YOU TIME; the libido & the passion will follow. So there you have it guys. If you're not getting hard it doesn't automatically mean you've got true ED & associated medical problems. It's much more likely a fall off in performance due to ageing, which can be addressed, but you gotta work at it, as I've found out recently for myself.

I've had medical 'issues' this year, which I'm in the process of winding back by way of fairly rigorous physical training. No pain No gain as they say, but let me tell you, I'm feeling waaaaay fitter. Selling Darlington, meant working from home, and a more sedentary work environment. Performing as an escort brings it's own challenges.... you're so experienced with sex, you've seen it all or most of it, done so many of the things most men would die for, it becomes routine. In short, the bar for stimulation gets raised ever higher... meaning as a sex worker one has to get one's head in the right place to assist with stimulation & get a hard dick. The brain's the biggest sex organ guys, right? Years ago, any meeting would have got me rampant, the same goes for many of our clients. These days I still get hard every meeting, & can outperform most men, some twenty years my junior, but ROCK SOLID IRON BAR doesn't happen so often, except for those times when I'm really turned on the max and the cock does its own thing.  I'm not going to divulge what situations cause the switch to be flipped... they are for me to know & you to wonder! #tradesecrets. Rest assured, if you book a sesh with us, whether it be as a couple or solo, you'll not be disappointed.....

Fun50Couple-SCREWS

So guys, on to SCREWS (plural). I'm mindful so many 'Screws' shared with you good peeps involve bi-curious men in MMF situations, or they're cuckolds, occasional straight MFM's... but truth is over 75% of our 'business' comes from subbies aka submissives, ranging from newbies to hard core. When we had Darlington there were months when we did no three-ways at all. Instead they were all kink themed meetings, one to one with either of us, or sometimes with us both (double dom/me). That's not to say we're uninterested in bicurious three-ways, far from it. We LOVE THEM, however, that comes with a caveat. So many applicants bottle out, or they torture themselves by overthinking. A good many of them, in effect, raise their own barriers to delay or even prevent a LIVE meeting. Commonly they'll make out it's difficult to make contact...it's NOT, it takes a two minute phone call; they'll say they can never call because they're at work or with the wife... so call on your lunchbreak or from your car! We've finally met fellas who've held back for years before 'plucking up the courage'. Couple this sort of procrastination with declining desire in folk across the board to 'live dangerously' & you'll see reasons why MMF's are fewer than they were ten years ago. I think things peaked around 2018/19 on the liberalisation front.  Ever since then its been going backwards. Unfortunately, not many folk seem to be truly AWAKE. Awake to the very real threats to our freedoms posed by a Parliament that's basically two cheeks of the same ass, taking their orders from a clandestine few... twenty players or so in essence, powerful individuals behind the New World Order: Rothchild(s), Soros, Schwab, Gates, Charlie & Co. Talking of Gates, we had a guy yesterday, a kind and intelligent soul, who casually remarked about the 'mandatory vaccines' we 'all had' during Convid. Yes, the bloke actually believed you HAD to take them, so powerful was the Government Machine in its influence. I mention this, because Minx & I have never been ones to follow the fold. We, and our daughter, collectively, do our own research, and don't blindly follow mainstream media, all of whom are bought by either BigPharma or BigTech (for example: Gates partially funds, and therefore influences the BBC and The Guardian)

Within a month of the onset of the 'pervasive sickness' we smelt a rat. By mid summer of 2020, we'd discovered to our total surprise and horror, all manner of unsavoury connections between the so called 'elites' and Western governments (especially within the Anglosphere). I won't go into any more detail, but this from 2017,  should ring alarm bells, and perhaps kickstart you own quest for, shall we say, 'clarity'.

I remember Minx saying back in March 2020, things will never go back to how they were. How right she was. Large numbers insist on subscribing to the 'NEW NORMAL', #stayingsafe for the benefit of the greater good (communism with a small c). Fortunately for us and our industry, submissives are among those still prepared to take risks, push limits and live life to the full on their terms. (which is a bit of a paradox I know, since they wanna submit to a dominant; it all gets a bit confusing, topping from the bottom & blurred lines; rest assured, that IS something we can handle, in most cases. I say most, because we're still growing too). So for this month's SCREW I'm bringing you two meets, one is a hot MMF; the other, which some might find squeamish, involves a hard core sub, some-one we've been working with for around 7 years. I decided to share both, because if I just highlighted the meeting with the sub, you might have thought we were too hard core for YOU & any potential future experience. We're interested in a broad range of sexy men, so whoever/wherever you are, don't hesitate to reach out to us, okay? We would love to meet you, yes YOU! (over 35's only)

Time to meet Trevor. Trevor's a 40 year old (just) welder from Hull, divorced, works offshore, been to a couple of swingers clubs with former spouse, admits to being bi-curious. Over the past year he'd attempted to hook up with couples on Fab Swingers (UGHHHHHHH). Unsurprisingly he'd been let down, including two times recently, so he felt the need to do something which promised a more positive outcome, hence his call to us. The first time turned out to be a no go. He'd called from a distance, & not realised how far we were from him and cancelled a planned liaison. Second time around, he had more time. Since he'd called before and not turned up, we asked for a deposit. No problem! The guy paid the whole fee in a oner, all good!! So around 5PM one afternoon about a fortnight ago, Trevor called from the 'holding point' to get directions. At this stage a lot of guy's brains are in their pants and they just don't process the information, speeding past our road end, then sheepishly calling again to say they're lost. Not so with Trevor though; within minutes a Q-whatever electric Audi pulled up. A tall stocky guy got out & strode down the path to our door, reached for the knocker, then came straight in as Geeze simultaneously opened the door. 'Hello! You wasted no time getting here!'  He was quite a good looking chap, around 6ft 2", muscular, a mild belly, and a little surprisingly... man boobs. Kissing Minx then turning to me, he appeared excited, almost to the extreme, though I couldn't help but notice trembling fingers. 'There's an iced water for you bro....' then 'Hmmmmm.... man titties I see....'
Fondling Trevor's right breast through the material of his rugby shirt as Minx kissed him on the cheek while he sipped on his water soon got him settled; then it was onward and upward to the playroom. He seemed pretty startled by it, backing away for an instant, until we assured him we were in escort mode, and he had nothing to fear... Now soft spoken, 'Ahhh I was just expecting a bedroom....'

I think his experience on Sad Swingers had caused him to paint a mental picture of some seedy room with hard core porn streaming from a 6 foot telly hosted by a couple of heavily pierced & tattooed lifestyle swingers. Instead, he got something more akin to the chamber, & the people for that matter, centerstage in the Fifty Shades trilogy.

Minx was wearing wet-look, barely concealing a dark green & black basque finished with velvet, which had a hard job containing her 'assets'. The words 'busty' and 'voluptuous' come to mind, & one (of the many) reasons I'm attracted to her. Still so, after 17 years... and so it should be really! Both of us endured highly unsatisfactory partnerships in the past. Yesterday she was especially erotic during a meeting, I'll tell you how and why someday.

'So get your kit off then, we don't bite...'. Geeze was already down to just a purple thong, but within minutes our Trevor was in the buff! At ease now what with all the laughter, the enticing environment, and expectations of what might cum, T's cock was visibly hardening; a good semi around 5 inches with more promised judging by his foreskin, still bunched up around his bell end, but ever so slowly retreating as his cock continued to stiffen. Geeze took hold of it while drawing the three of us together with his arm, into a position for a three-way snog. It got very passionate very quickly. Clearly there was chemistry between us. In fact, it would be fair to say there was no holding back, things got so intense. Minx ordered the two men to frot, then went down on us both. We held out cocks together in parallel as she maneuvered her mouth around & then onto them, swirling her tongue over both tips, then gorging on them both as one. It felt wonderful. She was hitting so many spots for both men. Trevor started thrusting, but Minx is a bit of a tease. Drawing away she lay back, legs apart; the dimmed spotlights above the frame of the bondage bed accentuating the shadows within her upper thighs, drawing the eye to her glistening pussy. 'Lick my clit' she ordered, then 'No! THAT doesn't work!' as Trevor thrust a finger between her lips, 'Lightly!!'
Trevor duly obeyed. Clearly he was turned on by Minx, not just by her curves, but by her authority too. 'AHHHHHH you're making me cum....' she cried 'Get a towel quick Geeze.....' Gushing with an almighty sigh, then 'OOHHHHHHH I'm STILL cumming....Oh you SEXY MAN Trevor', then....'More.....' Stooping again, Trevor buried his face in her wet cunt, elevating his bottom while spreading his knees & legs on the soft purple throw. Geeze wriggled under him, taking Trevor's cock deep in his mouth. As if there wasn't already ample evidence of his arousal, copious pre-cum was further proof. Geeze didn't flinch... savouring the taste. This was a meeting Made In Heaven. Funnily enough, just beforehand, Minx & I had been bemoaning the fact that bi three-ways had been few & far between lately. But this tryst more than made up for it. Once she'd exhausted herself physically AND mentally from the female ejaculation, Minx stood back up 'Go on you two...play, let me see you both cum...' Geeze had noted Trevor's generous foreskin from first sight. Aligning his stiff cock with Trevor's, he drew the other man's foreskin away from his dick then over and onto his own. Once in line & super rigid, he proceeded to push deep into that sheath of skin, effectively fucking Trevor's cock. It's a practise known as 'docking' and very often it can be hit and miss. There's either not enough skin, or there's a mismatch in girth, or one guys not hard enough or kinky enough, but today it was green for Go. Pushing right in and staying tight together, both men maintained balance and hardness.... the latter not too difficult either, as levels of arousal intensified. Geeze could feel Trevor pre-cumming so much that he thought for a moment he'd let go, but he hadn't. It felt very wet and very hot, in temperature as well as the act itself. Minx continued to give words of encouragement.  All Trevor could do was utter profanities, 'Oh Fuck! OHHHH Ahhhh FUUUUUUUCK!!!!' over and over and over...that's when you know some-one's really lit.

'Let's wank together, cum over my cock!' shouted Geeze. Minx was pushing her big tits together....'Cum where you like' she cried as Trevor masturbated furiously. There was a sharp intake of breath, then an excruciating sound, pain-profanity-relief all bundled together as Trevor shot his load. Aiming for Geeze's cock most of it missed as it arced upward towards Minx's cleavage. Nevertheless, Geeze still felt the seed raining down on his tummy, scalding hot it was too. Still wanking himself, Geeze just missed cumming in synchrony with Trevor. All the same, his outburst was impressive, shocking both Trevor and Minx. Heavy shards of jism erupted from his cock, nearly 7 inches hard, rigid as a rod of iron; He'd been edging off and on for a couple of days; that, and the intensity of this three-way meant a heavy load and a ton of pressure. 'Oh my God' screamed Minx and then 'O.M G, Ohhh Emmmmm Geeeee..' several times as Geeze let go, the shower blasting between the stainless square mesh of the bondage bed onto the wall behind, where it ran down in thick globules; it was on the wall, the metal, on Geeze's face, and (thankfully) Trevor's cock too, Job Done!

It truly was one of those sexual situations where you almost want to eat each other. It must have ticked the right boxes for the client too. A couple of hours later we got this [verbatim]

"Hi, I hope you don't mind me messaging again but I've just got home and I'd just like to say how much I absolutely loved that. It was absolutely, everything I wanted it to be. I'm busy with work & kids for a few weeks now but I definitely want to come back if that's ok? I'd love to play with Minx a little more she is so sexy, I really have a thing for curvier older women and the Scottish accent really gets me going haha! And Geeze your cock is incredible and I love how filthy you are! You're both very friendly and exactly the type of people I'd enjoy spending time with, I loved it, thank you both and take care xx

WOW. Thank you. All in all, a perfect client.

But like I said before, punters come in all shapes and sizes, from all backgrounds, including those with a darker side. Hard core subs often are people who deal with or have dealt with, a good deal of crap in their lives. Heightened responsibility perhaps, pressured work environments, different/difficult childhoods... none of these things are a given... some guys are wired differently, from when they were developing in the womb... where we all start with a clitoris believe it or not; some grow into a true female clitoris, with males it becomes a cock & balls, and others fall somewhere in-between the two. Even rarer are people born with both, but not as rare as you may think. They're known as 'intersexes', so if anyone fiercely slaps you down in a gender debate and vehemently proclaims there are only two genders, they are wrong. Intersex is an extreme, however there are many shades in between. Often we come across, in the course of our communications with potential new clients, subs who don't even know they're subs. We know this, because over time, from reading hundreds of introductory messages and emails, patterns emerge. Subs invariably communicate in a certain style, through habit; it' not something they do consciously, it's a trait. There are other giveaway signs too, I'm not going to mention them here... but they ARE out there. Interestingly we have a relation, who married late in life. The juries out, but to us it looks for all the world as if he's in a a de-facto FLR, (female led relationship, he's wed to his boss) lending credence to our suspicions based on body language & more, that he's a hard core submissive; possibly unbeknown to his partner. A bit like Roy, the guy I'm going to tell you about in the second of our 'SCREWS'.

He's divorced too, aged 55 and now cohabitating with one of his customers. Talk about risk! Funny that. He's a director of several firms acting as an advisor to them but get this! The company he heads himself delivers a form of risk management to the public sector! You wouldn't know it to look at him... normal attire is jeans, a puffer jacket and loafers. He owns several cars, all luxury models and enjoys numerous (like every month or so) holidays & short breaks to Spain, the Middle East and other places. I tease him, calling him a playboy. A playboy whose nearest and dearest, not to mention scores of buddies, buddies he frequently goes on 'social jaunts' with, and hundreds of employees have no clue about Roy's 'other life'... as a submissive, hopelessly addicted to humiliation, degradation, and pleasure which could mean attending to Master, or as the recipient of ever larger & more extreme anal insertions, cum, and piss, usually a mix of all those things. An hour's meet with Roy, generally calls for  three and a half hours work from me, prepping, scheduling (sometimes I work to a written timetable), tearing down & cleaning up post meeting.

Roy first visited us both for bi MMF's around 7 years ago. I think he came to see us about three times, then dropped off the radar until about four years ago. Since then, he's met Master most months, sometimes on a weekly basis. He's an organised chappy, as am I. We click. Each meeting starts the same.... he has his own douche stored here, he gets prepped, then I put him in chastity using a CBT6000 (Perspex adjustable device, US made, padlocked). After that I fit him with a tight leather gimp hood which restricts his hearing and his sight, (sensory deprivation) leaving a pair of small holes for breathing and another one for his mouth. It can be fitted with a ball gag, but I prefer to leave his mouth free, you'll see why in a moment. All the time he's inhaling poppers, STRONG poppers [ahem!]; room odorisers I should say. In case you don't know what poppers are, click this link.  As I'm lacing his hood up tight, I can see his upper body turning red with a texture similar to chicken skin; its an effect of the poppers. Depending on how long its been since I've seen him, depends on what I start him off with. He'll usually send me a text to tell me he's in need of 'big dildos in his ass' for instance, or 'could do with a full load of spunk fired down my throat'  or 'wants cock cage on, nipple clamps, popper me right up and piss and spunk in my mouth'; those three examples are messages I've just copied off my phone. I did warn you before that you may find this a bit too extreme, in which case, please turn the page. I don't mind, so long as you keep subscribing to NVS for the more prosaic meets. We don't wanna lose you. FACT IS, in this life, neither you, me, or Minx, have any idea where we will ACTUALLY be, sexually or spiritually, years from now. I remember watching a documentary decades ago about extreme 'perversions'; the word the film people used. It really should have been 'kinks' but as is customary with broadcasters they feel compelled to stigmatise paid sex, or extreme sex/BDSM acts. Interesting thing is, the people who pour scorn on these activities are often the most perverted themselves, some dangerously so. In the film I remember an older guy being given a pint of piss to drink by a dominant escort; he clearly relished the experience, much to the disbelief of the reporter/commentator. I also recall how I felt at the time. Neither for or against to be honest. It didn't disgust me, it didn't shock me. I've always been (when it comes to sex) 'live & let live'. I wasn't remotely interested in doing anything like that myself, not even curious, but age, experience, lifestyle, all those things can contrive to change you, over time. Especially if you're sex positive in nature to begin with. I guess sometimes it can lay dormant, then a catalyst or a series of them come along and shifts your opinion. Who you're with & who you associate with can count too. I'm not referring to those people as influencers per se, I'm just pointing out that actions you take in response to others can mold you, brand you even, in ways you wouldn't previously have thought possible or even probable. So guys, before you say 'I could never do anything like that'.... HOLD! You never know. It's the same with the straight brigade, when they define others in simple terms, 100% gay or 100% straight, you're either one thing or the other. You see, you NEVER KNOW. You could be stone cold sober, level headed, in a good place in your life, and all of a sudden be overwhelmed, & caught off guard, trust me. It happens. Every. Frikin. Day. Anyway back to Roy. Flavour of the month for him right now seems to be 'exchange of fluids', either swallowing cum or watersports.

I chide him when he's been out of touch for longer than about a fortnight. I tell him he's not taking his training seriously. In reality he does. It's a huge part of his life, but time is his enemy. Important people are forever in meetings, and he has them back to back for days on end. So its often a case of him coordinating OPPORTUNITY with kinky liaisons at fairly short notice. Abstinence can cause his ass to tighten, and we lose momentum, meaning we have to work on opening him up again. So if it's three weeks or more since I've seen him, my 'go-to' tool of choice, guaranteed to re-kindle anal desire, is the anal hook.

I insert it  carefully, attaching it to a camouflage patterned leather collar I reserve for him, joined to the steel hook by an adjustable leather strap. As a matter of fact I've just renewed the original Chinese or Indian mass produced factory leather.... with locally sourced hand crafted hide. I've also got a tender out for local manufacture of our own steel hooks. Gradually we're going to re-open FUN-FIVE-O, the online sex store for sex positive men and M/F couples.

Formerly we used to stock the same kind of lines as most other adult pleasure stores, sourced from sex industry wholesalers. Their undermining of their own trade customers, their greed, and the declining quality of stock resulting from them churning out own label copies of respected brands, not to mention endless hurdles put up by payment providers led us to suspend sex toy retail a few years back. Mainstream retail is a mugs game. Niche, artisan supplies are a different proposition altogether, and the harness & hook are the first of a limited number of quality British made items we'll be re-introducing FOR SALE, over coming months. The anal hook is one of the simplest devices out there, but also one of the most powerful, for men and women. Adjusting the strap enables one to find the right level of comfort; there's a fine line between pleasure and pain. Pain means damage or likelihood of wounding, & its something we don't like to promote. Get it right and the recipient, or even someone playing solo, will be stimulated to the max. So a couple of weeks ago, once the hook was in, I led subby to the bondage bed. Some times I order him to put one foot up on the frame, leave the other on the floor, and to suck me as I stand on the bed. The rhythmic motion of the head, tightens the strap to the hook and massages his prostate automatically, evidenced by precum appearing as a sticky thread from the chastity device. But today was different. A couple of weeks previous, another subby, one who'd kindly given us a spreader bar as a gift (handmade) fellated me to the point of absolute ecstasy for around thirty minutes while restrained by the bar he'd crafted, attached to leg cuffs and chained to the bondage bed frame. So with Roy, I was eager to replicate the feeling, with tighter control. I'd attached a chain lead to the collar too, so he was on a tight leash. I wrap the chain round my fist, and move subby's head to where I want him. Roy has one failing, one which I'm gradually addressing. It's a case of constantly tweaking him, through risk and reward. He has a habit of giving up on things too early; anal insertions for example. He'll put his hand up when they get too big...even when he's taken bigger before. Same with sucking. Yet another subby I see, trains himself to take cock in his mouth balls deep. I kid you not, before each meeting he inhales a hefty dose of Lemsip or menthol to clear his airways. He has a fourteen inch double ender dildo, which over twenty years he's trained to take all the way down his throat. He can gorge on my cock fully, for periods up to 15 minutes, without a break. Wow. And I can totally understand what he gets from it. I swallowed a smallish guy the other day. His penis fitted perfectly in my throat; the feeling was quite sublime, filled but not so EXTREME that I couldn't relax and enjoy the experience. Many women take cock deep, and they gag; sometimes that reflex promotes a feeling of deep lust and NEED; it's a skill well worth developing, male or female. Different strokes for different folks I guess. Anyway Roy wanted cum, and did he get it! But it took a good twenty minutes. Because every time he hit the spot, he'd shift position shortly after; All the time he was giving head, the hook was moving too. By the end of the session he'd taken a hefty dose of my seed, swallowed the lot, and benefited too from the hook working its magic. His ass was now well and truly massaged, and ready for bigger, better, bolder.

I strapped him to the fucking bench tummy down, eased the hook out of him, and removed the connecting strap from the collar, while still retaining control via the leash. Inserting a large glass bead type dildo at an angle I was able to massage his P-spot, to the point of him pre-cumming once more. This time a long thread streamed from his glans, I stretched it a good two feet before it broke off.  Twizzling some of it round my index finger I offered him it, to lick clean. Next up was a heavy steel dildo, ice cold, that one he likes partially in. Now he was nicely open for business. Next up comes the inflatable. I pop it in and pump it up. When I'm cleaning it I inflate it in the bath; it grows to the size of a marrow, & its shaped like one too, designed to mirror the shape of the rectum for a good fit. I get a good way with the pump, before subby raises his hand. From thereon its a case of releasing the pressure then pumping it up again to a point just past where he was previously, without him realising. Every time there's a step change I tell him to sniff.  I keep the pressure on & twenty seconds after that I push firmly but gently, and he takes it. Once I'm done with that, I get the veiny 8 inch cock dildo. It's a strap-on modelled on an American porn star; its delicious not least because with it being veiny its ultra realistic, and not particularly forgiving. You reach that critical juncture, that last push through the upper sphincter; you want it, you dare not push anymore, butt [sic] then you do, and POP! It's in, and you're in EXTACEEEEEEEEE. I'd hazard a bet a good many readers haven't indulged in ass play, yet. It may even turn you off, you might deem it purely a 'gay' thing (it's not).  Thorough preparation mentally & physically, take baby steps over weeks and months, will lead you to dizzy heights of sensation you probably didn't know existed. A partner who likes anal sex is a start...its only natural to wonder what it might be like for you, if she (or he) likes it. An ass is an ass right? Yes and no; because remember in a man it affords almost direct access to his P-spot. Once you hit that, there's no going back, its addictive. I and some of my/our clients have been there, reaching a stage where sometimes you feel it's getting out of hand. You stop it all together, throw all your toys away and forget it, or try to; that sentiment seldom lasts though. In time you want it. Again. Only this week I had a phone sex caller tell me his bum self lubricates and twitches at the thought of it. Doctors tell you that's not possible. The same doctors tell you vaccines are safe and effective. I rest my case.

This particular time, Roy had sent several texts prior to our meeting, telling me he wanted to be gaped. That's easier said than done; Yes I know, you've probably seen porn shoots of gaping, prolapses, fisting etc, all heavy stuff, but some of those things need years of practise. I'd invested in an anal spreader a while back, with Roy in mind. They're stainless steel rings with adjustable fingers in the middle, & not cheap, running about a hundred quid each. We'd tried it briefly on a previous occasion, and he'd suffered discomfort. I figured this time, with his ass loosened up nicely, strong poppers and a promise of a reward at the end if he complied, he'd take it. I told him to stay with it, and to keep inhaling. Holding the ring in place I turned the five screws, one after the other, in sequence. The fingers open from the

middle, stretching the circumference hence the diameter of his hole. Keep going and it opens up enough to see right it. Are you still there? I hope so. I warned you about being graphic. This stuff's not for the faint of heart! Roy desperately craved piss. Piss on his cock, his body, his mouth was still a maybe. His ass was top of the list. He wanted me to piss into his ass. And that's what he got. For a first attempt it didn't go too bad. The hole wasn't huge, but it was a target well enough defined to aim for. The angle wasn't ideal either, #workinprogress. I'd drunk loads beforehand, & kept it in while he sucked me. Cumming or being stimulated while you're really needing to pee can be a turn on in itself, I've learnt that after many requests for watersports; I'd spread a PVC sheet over the laminate (its waterproof anyway, for hygienic reasons). Pulling roughly on the chain attached to his collar I simultaneously directed the golden shower over his butt. Once I was in full flow, I concentrated more on his anus, firing a solid jet of pee into his hole, bulls eye!  Once again, job done #sexworkisrealwork. Subby deserved a reward. Checking on his wellbeing, he seemed remarkably composed. Almost at peace with himself. 'How was that subby?' His kind aren't renowned for heaping praise on anyone. They tend to be introverted, 'cards close to their chest types'. 'Yeah, good' was all he could manage. Only later, the next day via text did he enthuse over the meeting; 'Good session yesterday and I'm definitely finding the cum and piss more kinky'. Brief and to the point but I really appreciated it, not least because I know how these people work. Praise is a rare thing, so I must have done something right. Plus, he's always back for more. I suppose that's the ultimate accolade. It's a living too!

The milking machine goes out for £200 a session, with a minimum of an hour and half. there are no extra charges, so if guys don't like the milker for whatever reason, they can have anything else at no extra cost. I'd scheduled thirty minutes for FREE for Roy, if, and only if, I felt he deserved it. The anal spreader was the test, and he'd passed with flying colours. So I strapped him into the sling on the bondage bed and dropped the milker's SPT down onto his dick, now freed from the chastity device. He's what you'd call a grower, smallish flaccid, but large with a bulbous head when hard, around 6.5 inches. Trouble is he OD's sometimes on the poppers and it can go either way; an erection is denied under influence of the amyl. Other times, the kinkiness overrides the substance and he rises to the occasion. Today the milker was doing all the heavy lifting, first by sucking his penis in to the tube, then massaging him till erect, which took less than a minute. As is the case with most subs, his nipples are super sensitive; but I've been forbidden to use the suckers, because once they left a mark, & it was noticed by his other half. Like most men with a background in building and construction, he's an accomplished bullshitter, succeeding in brushing her off with a load of nonsense about something rubbing against his chest at work. Yeah, right Roy! So, on this occasion I used a pair of strong nipple clamps, joined by an elastic strap and ring. Attaching them to the flesh surrounding the tit keeps them where they're supposed to be, then drawing the elastic strap upward & outward takes Roy to supreme levels of nipple stim; I'm able to work the nipple clamps AND the milker valves at the same time. From my own observations & use of the kit, I've found very little suction coupled with just enough pulsation but not too much to start any vertical motion.... that combination works very well as an edging device. Pretty soon Roy was bucking and moaning; I increased the suction then opened the pulsator a tad more; the device was milking him now fast and furious, just like it milks the dairy cows on the Texas plains, from where it originates. Ha! 'I'm gonna cum! I'm gonna cum' whispered Roy. 'PERMISSION GRANTED!' Writhing in the sling, he climaxed inside the sleeve; it was then up to me whether we kept going or whether we stopped. The unit is well capable of forcing multiple orgasms. He'd had a full 90 minutes of attention and only got charged for an hour, so I elected to stop. I turned down the machine, causing it to suddenly break loose from his cock, showering the PVC sheet with lube and cum; a thick white ball of sperm lay trapped in hair around his pubic mound. 'Pretty good eh subby?' Roy was lost for words; clambering out of the sling, while holding onto my hands for balance, we warmed down together. Hood off, iced water to drink, the offer of chocolate in case he'd 'dropped', a warm towel wrapped around his body. And that my friends is a fairly routine meeting with a hard core sub. What follows afterwards, is a good couple of hours sterilizing equipment & toys, cleaning PVC sheets, mopping up etc etc, all part and parcel of our kinky lifestyle. Would a meting like that work for YOU? Let us know. In the meantime: You subscribe to NEWS VIEWS AND SCREWS to learn more about our life as an Escort Couple. YOUR PLEASURE is OUR BUSINESS as we turn fantasy into reality. #WhatDreamsAreMadeOf! We tell you the way it is….and we thank you for your continued support. Until next time, take care, Luv, fun50couple xxx

Do 'fly-on-the-wall' stories like these turn you on? Are you one of those 'wishing'? All we share with you in NEWS VIEWS AND SCREWS is true*!  You, yes YOU, could be participating & enjoying scenarios like these a few short hours from now, anywhere in the UK. So, pick up the phone! Don't be shy. Call Minx TODAY or email us at support@fun50couple.com. See you soon!

* Please note we NEVER divulge people’s identities and we have changed some names and details to preserve complete anonymity.

* The Free Speech clip is David Clews from Unity News Network https://unitynewsnetwork.co.uk/our-social-media-links/

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