MIDSUMMER 2023  
'NEWS VIEWS & SCREWS'
ESCORT LIFESTYLE MAGAZINE

Fun50Couple-NEWS

Hello sexy friends! 'Dear' sexy friends I should say, cuz we love you all! For months I've felt disinclined to hit the keyboard. So what's changed? Well, firstly it's midsummer (21st June solstice) & I'd better pump something out so we're at least a QUARTERLY publication. Secondly..... we've experienced a bit of rough and tumble lately, meaning the pair of us have been exposed to 'normies'; that's not something we do much of as a close couple keeping ourselves to ourselves with few friends or relatives. Strange isn't it....working full time in the oldest profession yet shunning the company of others outside work. We've been forced to OBSERVE and REFLECT, prompting APPRAISAL & ultimately FULL ENDORSEMENT of our chosen way of life. So buckle up guys for some thought provoking stuff! Let me explain.

It started in a hotel room. A 55 year old had unexpectedly found himself in our town for the night, so booked us for an outcall as a 'voyeur'. He'd never seen a couple before, just single females. We've seen a lot like him lately for whatever reason. A lot of guys don't reveal very much, until they feel they can trust you. Then they come out with all kindsa stuff. In the case of voyeurs, they proclaim they're straight almost to a man. Undeniably though, there's that fascination with 'cock'. Some barely talk (not good); they watch, they wank and go. Others, once they've discovered we're friendly & non judgmental with a TON of experience, feel emboldened to 'open up' no pun intended. More about that in 'SCREWS'. Anyway, there we were, performing in front of our man, when Minx decided to ride Geeze reverse cowgirl style. Long story short, I had to call a halt and slip away to the bathroom... as a wave of nausea swept over me. Closing the door quickly behind me, I made it to the basin & wretched several times. I felt SO SICK, but nothing came up except watery saliva... I tapped on the door & Minx came in. There was brief discussion about refunding our client's fee & us leaving, but that didn't happen. Instead, she went back, explained the situation and continued to entertain him. Meanwhile, I came round, and after a short while rejoined them. The meeting concluded about 45 minutes later with 'Peterborough Punter' exploding after we'd dug deep and pressed the right buttons. If you're wondering what I mean by that.... we'd found out what lay behind his fascination, & fine tuned the experience to raise his level of arousal to the point of powerful orgasm. Job done.

Stomach still raw, things only got worse. Most of the night was spent retching. There were no appointments available with the doctor for at least a week (No surprise there hey!) so they referred me to Urgent Care at the local hospital. As it happened I had an X-ray appointment the same place & time following a consultation with a GP the week previous. I won't bore you with details, but Urgent Care referred me to Darlington hospital. The next two days were spent in a CDU (Clinical Decisions Unit). All kindsa tests took place with slightly elevated readings on inflammation apparently but nothing to be concerned about. They offered to operate to 'fix' a problem, but there were two patients with life threatening conditions who needed to be sorted first. We elected to postpone the procedure and go on their waiting list. Now let me tell you, when you're an escort you don't under any circumstances divulge that information to your medical practise. There are all kinds of implications, not least life insurance, stigma, intervention by authorities and more. If you know you're going to have tests, its best to check for STI's before you go, so at least 'YOU KNOW' if there 'is something' and you can prepare a story.

One reason you subscribe to NVS is because you're fascinated by our roller coaster life, warts and all; you're probably a perv too, fairplay. Testing is part of the territory. However, since Convid, GUM clinics are no longer taking walk-ins. This means you have to fill out a form online and they send you the kits to YOUR HOME ADDRESS. Redirection to a Post Office isn't an option. This isn't a problem to us obviously, save for the inconvenience, but to a punter it most definitely is. How is he going to explain a parcel with NHS plastered all over it dropping on his door mat? I wonder, often wonder in fact, how many punters EVER get tested. I would hazard a bet there are very few.... they only seek tests when things get dire. I well remember as a Merchant Navy cadet perusing the graphic illustrations of STI's, in full colour, between the pages of a thick hardback manual common to every Chief Steward's book shelf, usually alongside stacks of porn. Chief Steward's (officer rank) dealt with crew 'health' issues in those days. I'd say at least 60% of the ships company would routinely frequent whorehouses & 'bang off' as they used to say. Some would go every time the ship docked.  There were ports where we anchored off, & the whores came out to the ship in canoes, scrambled up rope ladders and co-habitated with the seamen in their private cabins for the duration of docking and/or cargo operations. A good many guys 'got something', & were treated on board once we were back under way. Invariably they'd hope to be all cleared up before the next dock, a few days or even weeks later. That was Merchant Navy life. And oilfield life too... especially in jungle areas of West Africa & the Far East. Where's there's muck there's brass... 'a brass' even! You're maybe too young to pick up on that term, but I digress. Anyway, Geeeze regularly tests privately for HIV, & for both HIV and STI's with the NHS. So if we find ourselves in a situation like last week, we know at least they're not going to come back with a positive STI result, and QUESTIONS. As professional escorts, we owe it to our customers too of course, to 'Know Our Status'. Touch wood, there's only been one minor case in 12 years between the two of us. So why have I shared all this? Reason being, it put us amongst 'general public' AND the NHS.

The more we work as escorts, the more we pick up on 'people'. How they really are, the little signs, mannerisms and more. You get really good at sussing people out... and the more times you're vindicated, the better you get, because you're less inclined to doubt your POV. 90% of AdultWork service providers are amateur's trying to make a quick buck, but when you're a full time escort and your whole income depends on 'sales' of services, it pays to TAKE NOTICE and market accordingly. That can also mean blowing some clients out too hence the reason we INSIST on a brief telecon with anyone new AKA sorting wheat from chaff & STAYING OUT OF TROUBLE. We're in hard times, with a lot tougher to come IMO. We've the worst 'sticky' inflation in the Western World, and it stems (like other countries) from the excesses of the plandemic.... EG the money printing to mitigate the effects of lockdown forced upon most of us due to a GROSS OVER REACTION from so called leaders. In the UK it's worse because labour shortages caused by Brexit means the job market's is tight. Supply can't meet demand, hence wage pressure. Couple that to low productivity, & you've got a problem. To make matters worse, neither Sunak (the instigator of much of the printing) or Hunt, have any empathy whatsoever with the ordinary 'man in the street'. Things are coming to a head.... with the 'boats', the cost of living, mortgages, woke culture & two parties effectively opposite cheeks of the same ass... I think as a nation, we've fallen. We're fast becoming a cold, hard, aggressive & angry collective, an urban culture, divided, bruised and battered by domestic conflict. I reckon a hot summer could result in it all blowing up BIG TIME, and I think Nottingham could be a precursor to that. The city has 'form' as does Bristol. It looks to me as if Sunak's destroying as much as he can while he still has time, there's no way in my view the Tories can win another election, not under him anyway. Fascinating how The Telegraph and others are now saying Liz Truss was right; she didn't brief the markets though, hence her downfall. Everyone's affected. The trick is to ride the storm and come out a winner not a loser, something we've been reasonably successful with to date. It's times like these that you're truly glad to be self employed and answerable to no-one. If you're skillful enough as a business person, you can at least raise income or diversify to compensate for interest rate shocks. We know other escort couples who pile clients high and sell to them cheap. They tour, staying at the dingiest hotels, and fuck till they're sore... 5, 6 clients or more a day, straight or bi; that's not our style AT ALL. Our 'upscale' bespoke bookings are in steady demand... people least affected by the 'macro' situation want a luxury sexperience and they're willing to pay for it, or so it would seem. They definitely DON'T WANT to interact with a couple who are merely 'going through the motions' in some seedy 2 star hotel. There's a market for both approaches I suppose. It's commonly acknowledged that in a recession it's the luxury brands that fall first, however, we'll take our chances. After all, there are hundreds of thousands of men who are secretly bicurious, bisexual, cross dressers or cuckolds... not many vanilla people are aware of that. We know, because 90+% of our clientele are within that narrow niche. Three to four times as many men identify in private to be that way, compared to numbers who identify as gay. That percentage is rising too. So, whenever we're out in public we tend to watch people, and discuss what we see. Most times there's a high degree of congruence...two minds shaped by shared experiences over 16 years.

From our 'close and personal' exploits in the bedroom with others, observations of general public and family, anecdotal evidence & more, we conclude that large numbers of people in relationships probably shouldn't be in them. They're either unhappy, or unfulfilled, too lazy to do anything about it, or have too much 'to lose'. We struggle with that latter category. Men tell us they 'stay because of what they've put into the house', or they stay because 'of the children'. If it were us, we'd be out... we can say that hand on heart because we've suffered the consequences of staying too long in previous relationships. Benefit of hindsight. In contemporary Britain genuinely loved up people, those with integrity, conscience and a soul.... WE THINK are a tiny minority. And when we do come across them, they STAND OUT, I kid you not. You may not have noticed this, and might think we're over generalizing. But then you don't have intimate experience with numbers of men running well into four figures do you? Few people live breathe, eat and sleep sex 24/7, for multiple years, nor would want to. That's why we feel qualified to comment. Our job makes us what we are... it kinda defines our persona.

Geeze's first visit to the medical practise was a case in point. The chairs had all been spaced out by 6-8 feet for 'distancing'. There was the usual bunch of miserable looking people waiting to be seen. A typical day. A steady procession of folk walking in, most ignoring the self service registration, choosing instead to blether for hours with receptionists. Or shouting I should say, because they've erected thick glass now to replace the scam PPE Perspex. Then a M/F couple walked in. He looked about ten years older than her, and didn't look the best health wise tbh. She on the other hand, was dare I say, 'serious talent', wearing 3 possibly 3.5 inch black patent heels, black nylons, short skirt and a businesslike jayket (Scots for jacket) She had long auburn hair, 32 tits I'd say with cleavage partially visible, but nothing overtly SEXUAL; it was her AURA that struck me though, within a half minute of her walking in. I only saw her face for a moment. They sat in the front row. She pulled a chair along to be next to her man. A few minutes later she hotched it even closer, resting one hand on his hip. Clearly she was in love with, and cared deeply for this guy. There was warmth in her every move and gesture. People like her are rare these days. I've talked about auras before in NVS. Everyone has one, some are negative some are positive, some are hardly discernable, others are in your face. What I witnessed was so striking I told Minx about it when I got home. This girl wasn't playing to a crowd. She had avoided eye contact with anyone save for her partner. It looked natural. Perhaps you're cynical, and think many couples are like this, but don't show it in public.

Sex positive people are often easily recognised by those 'in the know'. They may not be doing anything at all 'out of the ordinary' but it's the ch'i they project. It's the reason we see so few 99.5% straight men. 'Straight' men are different to bi inclined men, who are as different again to 'gay men'. Sex positive people are often bisexual. The more we do this job, the more we think they're some of the best people out there. They're empathetic to male and female and everything in-between. They KNOW different people have different percentages of male & female in their chromosomes. [Stay calm! I know that is controversial and a HOT POTATO! It's over politicised for sure, but here are two articles that are food for thought]. Bi people instinctively KNOW it's perfectly acceptable for a 'man' to have some feminine qualities, and vise versa. They DON'T NEED those notions to be forced upon them by the ideological left. This stuff's been out there since the birth of mankind; only recently have people seen fit to ram it down others throats, seeking to divide and rule. Eventually, when the heavy hand of OPRESSION reels back discussion or even acknowledgment of anything other than basic sexual reproduction, alternative activities & mindsets will continue just as before, underground & behind closed doors.

Forced interaction with our Medical Practise, then the Urgent Care & Xray, followed by Darlington CDU, brought the NHS sharply into focus. Like many out there, this past 3 years we've sought to AVOID hospitalisation at all cost, or even ringing a doctor. Large numbers of folk now distrust the medical profession and with good reason. Only now are the mainstream media beginning to report on corruption & manipulation by BigPharma. But still they are a tiny minority, and they're being shut down as fast as they emerge. The Telegraph's bankrupt anyway, seeking a buyer, & probably the reason they've broken rank. Government is succeeding in suppressing these TRUTH BOMBS, for now. But with each passing day the cracks are widening. We've been following Andrew Bridgen's dialogue for about a year. Sadly you'll probably know nothing about the man or even heard of him. Put his name into any browser other than Google or Bing. Covid's a bit like Brexit. It's split the nation. Interestingly, the same people who side with Remain, are broadly speaking, the same people who side with Lockdown & the same people who believe in Climate Change. The vitriol directed at Bridgen on social media and from Parliament is truly OFF THE SCALE. Time will be the judge, and I'm not referring to the charade being played out now with Hallet's inquiry. I'm talking about twenty years from now when the full effects of the actions of the past 3 years will be laid bare. There are 650 MP's in Parliament and Bridgen is the ONLY ONE speaking out. I'm beginning to believe that Andrew is the ONLY ONE out of 650 with a soul, based on what I've learnt through intimate interactions and conversations with ordinary people behind closed doors AND what I've seen out on the street. I genuinely think that's possible, not least when you consider the calibre of folk in contemporary politics... self serving, fickle wannabes, social media fakes & failures in real life, a bit like what they used to call expats to the Far East aka FILTH, which stood for Failed.In.London.Try.HongKong. Chris Patten springs to mind there.

So what did we see in the rank and file of the NHS? To be honest we saw in the main, friendly people delivering a service, and a half decent one at that, notwithstanding waiting lists & procrastination, &/or different doctors contradicting each other #NothingChanges. We still don't don't know what's wrong with Geeze. Somewhat refreshingly, a senior consultant conceded that even in this day and age, there are some things they never get to the bottom of or know the causes of. What we also saw was a work force outwardly 'appearing' back to normal... very few masks, people being friendly towards one another, co-workers embracing ealy morning and chatting enthusiastically among themselves, audible discontent about levels of pay etc etc. A microcosm of 'public sector Britain'. It was obvious these people really do think they're back to pretty much normal. They don't question recent events, its water under the bridge to them. They don't see themselves as pawns in a grand & sinister plot. Fortunately the televisions were off in most of the places we were at, perhaps there was a fault, but it was not to last. On the third day the BBC at full blast was being inflicted upon everyone, whether you liked it or not. We are under NO ILLUSION WHATSOEVER, that the minute the WHO decrees another Health Emergency these same people would do what they were told, and subscribe to us being totally excluded from society if we chose not to follow the fold. We wanted to like them, we really did. They appeared HUMAN and caring, but we know deep down, the prudent thing is to KEEP ALL AUTHORITY AT ARMS LENGTH, to distrust the government and any of its multiple agencies, and think for ourselves. #criticalthinking

We were discharged from hospital in time for breakfast at the local Toby. Again, friendly staff, acting as if life's back to normal. We found it all quite emotional, moving us almost to tears. Not least because none of these people seem to have a care in the world beyond paying bills, football, holidays, & doing the least work they can to get by. Most will have no knowledge of moves by groups I'd call 'Malthusian Tendency', the likes of the WEF, WHO, BigPharma, BigTech, the Banksters, Government, Local Councils even. None of these organisations are on your side.... trust me on that. Take a good look AT THIS & follow George, the Rebel Capitalist, you'll learn loads.

Other NEWS in brief: Remember the clothing optional holidays from 'Everything To Sea' featured in the last issue of NVS? I said I thought there'd be a market for them in other places too, away from Bali, and I was right. For 2024 they're introducing sailing cruises in the Canary Islands, France, Thailand, Philippines and New Zealand.

And there's more: I've mentioned in the past, Minx's fascination with Roman life. She's forever picturing soldiers marching up the Deer Street, just yards from our home, centuries ago. We visited the site of the old bridge they built over the Tees next to their small settlement at Piercebridge a couple of times. Apparently they used to sit, all the men together, on a communal toilet, no shame. There's a plan on view at the site by the side of architectural remains. Anyway, guess what now? Archeologists up near Hadrian's Wall have re-assessed a 6.5 inch wooden object, 2000 years old, initially thought to be a darning tool. 'Doctor Collins' a senior lecturer at Newcastle Uni said 'the question we found ourselves asking is what sort of object shaped like a phallus would have greater wear at both ends than in the middle? The answer? A dildo!' #Kinky #NorthEast [reminded me about the joke with the two nuns sharing a bath. One says to the other 'Where's the soap', & the other replies....'it does doesn't it'] hee hee...

Fun50Couple-VIEWS

The 'people' theme carries over into this month's VIEWS. Recently, we've met a lot of guys hitting the big SIX-0. A few years ago, we were told 50 was the 'New 40'. In other words, if you hadn't got your act together by that age, you'd better soon do it, before life passed you by. Back in the day (in childhood) it was common for people to retire at 65 & drop dead before 70. Unhealthy lifestyles, poorer living conditions and medical science nowhere near as advanced as it is today, meant life expectancy was way shorter than now, in 2023. It's another problem that's contributing to inflation, with growing numbers of pensioners needing to be paid from the public purse. But we're here to talk about sex. And guess what? Older people have sexual needs! Obvious to some of us, but revolting to many.... 'icky' is the term they use. You know I said I was disinclined to hit the keyboard for want of decent topics to discuss? Well right now, I'm OVERFLOWING with thoughts brought about by the medical issues AND recent trysts. I always research stuff before writing. Many topics warrant further investigation, following meetings that stand out for one reason or another. There were a couple lately, one I'll share with you below in SCREWS. You'll be like a fly on the wall. The other I'll allude to but keep mostly private. Said meeting was with an 88 year old. I would imagine some of you are recoiling in disgust... however, think about it...88 years old is YOU in a few decades time, so BE KIND.

The death of a parent is possibly the first time many people recognize an older person is simply a younger soul in an aged body that's worn out. A parent is someone you know intimately but not sexually, who you probably love. 'Probably's' a bit harsh I know but I'm leaving it in there. Up until their passing, you'll likely have been privy to some of their innermost thoughts and aspirations. This is especially true if they were active business/entrepreneurial/academic types, in contrast to those who take early retirement, whose main interests are grandchildren & the daily crossword [UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!] Yes I know, it takes all sorts, & its a good job we're not all the same. To us, obsessing over grandchildren evokes the same feelings of revulsion as 'sex with old people' does with others I'm afraid....

So the research along with a chance tweet on Twitter tied to #LonelinessAwareWeek lead me to discover Joan Price. She's an author and speaker, calling herself an 'advocate for ageless sexuality'. She's been called other things by the media: 'senior sexpert', 'the beautiful face of senior sex', 'the woman leading a sex revolution for seniors' and her favorite...'wrinkly sex kitten'. Joan's spicy, award-winning blog includes this post: 'The “Ick Factor”: 2006 vs 2023 Sexuality and Ageism' worth a look.... AFTER you've read SCREWS...find the link in the postscript. It prompted me to re-visit another one of our own sites, one I made a few years ago https://maturefuncouple.co.uk. I looked at the web pages through fresh eyes, as if I too was lonely (I'm not, but have been in the past). I think it's worth you looking too, especially if you're suffering with loneliness. You don't have to be alone, many people are lonely within marriage, sadly. The site is a mine of useful information & includes videos. It also promotes our services as worldwide travel companions (with benefits). Be brave & do something different! We may be just the tonic you need to kickstart happiness and banish loneliness to the bin. For good.

I've ordered five books written by Joan Price to further our knowledge of male sexuality & ageism, and all its quirks & opportunities. As a couple, we've always preferred meetings with men over 40. Occasionally we'll see a 30 something guy but sadly, very few Millennials seem capable or willing to communicate effectively. They won't phone, believing they'll meet on the strength of texts or their beloved WhatsApp. Never going to happen guys without a brief phone chat first! We've never seen it as odd that we prefer older men, until last week. A regular client told us hardly any couples see seniors, most only wanna meet thirty fives and under. Wow! Granted, some of the younger guys we see are more ACTIVE... 'in your face' would be better word to use. A good many of the older guys can still Fuck for Britain though, AND they've the benefit of EXPERIENCE which really counts. They also have staying power, not through choice perhaps, but useful nevertheless.

The meeting with the 88 year old went well. He sent us feedback:

Talking of being in harness, I was very glad to experience your playroom & the sling swing in
particular. A fantastic feeling being opened up & at the delicious mercy of you & Minx. I
can see that yesterday's activities are going to dominate my dreams for a long time to come,
as I had very vivid dreams last night. You are, indeed, a dream couple in my eyes. Thank
you again for everything. XXX G

He'd sounded frightfully posh on the phone & I'd got him down as ex RAF and a possible nightmare. We were prepared for the worst, but in reality he proved himself to be a gentle, sexually enlightened soul, well capable of satisfying a partner still, male or female. He had his wits about him on the road too.... alert and driving with a degree of verve is how I'd put it. We'd met him outside town & escorted him in due to poor phone reception. It's not the first time we've entertained an octogenarian, and won't be the last. It's one of the rewards of escorting...uncovering the person within. There have been numerous times when an older guy has truly let go. Its like the metaphorical mask comes off, revealing a younger being. Sometimes the face relaxes so much (lying down helps lol!) that you can visibly make out the younger man, as he was decades before. I've lost count of the many AMAZING EXPERIENCES we've had with men who you wouldn't normally give a second look to, in stark contrast to some of the so called 'studs' we've suffered at times, guys who think they're God's gift, with no clue about anything or anybody other than THEMSELVES.

Most of you will know about the Darlington dungeon & film suite we sold in August, and twig that we're currently sitting on the fence, waiting. That plan has received a boost this week, as mortgages spiral out of control. Increasing numbers of folk are getting into difficulties, meaning there are likely to be opportunities to snap up a bargain in 2024/or 25. At the beginning of the year I pointed out to Minx, one of the major UK housebuilders bullishly projecting a full quota of new builds this year. I said to her 'they may well build them, but selling 'em might prove difficult'. Formerly I would have put the guys behind these kinds of firms on a pedestal, spellbound by their rags to riches stories & their million pound bonuses; we met one such director from another national developer a couple of years ago....ostensibly he had it all... the mansion, the Bentley, a Thames riverside property, a trophy wife AND a girlfriend blah blah. (the girl friend was interesting... a senior bank official but a part time escort for the love of sex. The guy moved her into the marital bed the minute the wife's back was turned & she was away with you guessed it... the grandchild) I don't nowadays look at those kind of men in the same light. I remember the national housebuilder when they were a handful of blokes in offices I think in Surrey decades ago. They got big by greasing the right palms, sucking up to the government and milking one initiative after another, Help To Buy is an example. Studying financial markets night & day for three + years has given me an edge... I know now that a lot of their kind are chancers, like the politicians, fickle folk skilled in licking the right asses and screwing over retail customers. In February we visited one of their sites for the umpteenth time in 3 years....houses had SOLD signs affixed even before scaffolding reached 4 feet high... whole rows of them. Two weeks ago though it was a different story. There were a good number of completed dwellings, standing empty FOR SALE. Properties built 2 years ago in Phase 1 of the site are coming back on to the market, distressed sellers most of them, at discounts exceeding 10% in some cases. I believe we're going to see a crash of epic proportions, so we're continuing to hold. We're also considering what type of establishment to open next, and what demographic to pitch to. It remains to be seen what's going to happen to Commercial Real Estate, I've a feeling it'll fare even worse. I'd love to share some of our plans & thoughts, but confidentiality is key at this stage. Rest assured, whatever end of the price scale we buy in at, we're going to build something special, it's going to be something there's definitely DEMAND FOR, and it'll be HIGH END. Stay tuned.

Fun50Couple-SCREWS

So here goes..... meet Iain, a 50 year old CNC setter from Newark-On-Trent. What's CNC I hear you ask? CNC (Computer Numerical Control) is a manufacturing process that automates the control, movement, and precision of machine tools through the use of pre-programmed computer software. So basically the guy sets up complex machinery in places like Jaguar Landrover & Caterpillar. A geek through & through... in appearance.... slim build, short cropped hair, glasses, and a gadget for EVERYTHING. Oh yeah, he's a Harry Potter fan too, and read all 7 books, twice over. On the PLUS side, he's a super-sensual, considerate lover with an impressive cock prone to pre-cum, especially when you 'roll' his nipples. We've seen him several times, & he's definitely one on our 'A' list. (the kind of bloke you really look forward to being in company with)

He's an NVS subscriber too, so get's 'ideas' from the meets we feature. He told us he liked the one featuring Brian, the spirited cuckold we saw early one morning back in the winter. But instead of kneeling alongside & cleaning Geeze's cock, Iain wanted to be underneath (a common request) so he could tongue us both while in the act of intercourse. Hmmmm. Yes please!

For whatever reason it didn't work out like that. Minx & I had discussed his visit prior, and noted his request, so we kicked the meeting off 'canoodling' together on the sofa in reception. With men like Iain, it's pretty much FULL ON from the word go. Everyone knows each other & there's no need for ice-breaking, even though several months had passed since the last tryst. You kind of start as you mean to go on, so there was heavy three-way kissing, and wandering hands. We'd forgotten about his passion for nipple play, but were gently reminded when we remarked on how HARD his cock had become, in double quick time too. We'd tweaked his teats and squeezed his breast, only ever so briefly, but the result was plain to see....bulging denim. We'd noticed in the previous meet, Iain had 'submissive tendencies'; he needed direction. So after a short while, Minx ORDERED the two men upstairs, saying she'd join us in a few minutes.

I've told you before, she's a diamond. Knowing full well that Iain & myself are fully bisexual, she knew we'd be into each other PDQ once up those stairs. It had been a rough few days, but we were still ALIVE, reasonably WELL & KICKING; to hell with what may or may not transpire from X-rays. Living for the moment. Heavy nipple play both ways produced a tell tale thread of pleasure from the bell end of Iain's cock, stretching a good couple of feet when drawn away. Geeze not so. Pre-cum has never been a thing with him, at least not since teenage years. It does still happen though, but differently to other men. Instead of a fine thread oozing over time, it appears in the form of thousands of loose droplets showering every which way just before cumming heavy proper. TMI perhaps? Maybe, but isn't it interesting how we all vary? You'd think a cock's a cock, but that's not so. Minx re-joined us. It was her turn to be P>L>E>A>S>U>R>E>D. She summoned Emma. Not another woman you understand, but a high end dildo from Svakom. As I mentioned before, we knew the meeting with Iain would be a blast, and we like him... Minx WANTED to orgasm with him. Handing Emma to Iain, she motioned him to work on her clit. Then after a few moments she called for Geeze to give her 'The Big One' meaning the Doxy. Geeze plugged the monster in, handing it to his cohort. Client and escort faced one another, kneeling, him working on her, she working on him, with Geeze on his nipples. Brushing the intensely vibrating head of the mega wand against Iain's shaft had the desired affect. Under, over and down around his balls she teased until he could take no more. Transferring to a lying position between her thick GILF thighs, Iain buried his face in her pussy while she continued to lightly skim her pubic mound & clitoral hood with the wand. She got SO wet. Wet to the point of copious female ejaculation all over Iain's face and head, before running down on to a strategically placed towel, pooling in the indentation of the mattress protected by a PVC sheet. In no way is Emma a substitute for a man's attention, it just amplifies sensation to the point of massive internal orgasm when combined with skillful cunnilingus. Once she's had the internal climax, it makes her want to be fucked, and fucked hard straightaway after. Potential clients reading this missive TAKE NOTE!

So Iain was sprawled on the bed attending to Minx, his legs straight out, his pert little bottom in full view of Geeze, a mere spectator by now. But not for long. Sights sounds and smells combined to make G hard. There had been limited discussion beforehand about anal play. Rubbing Iain's anus with a gloved finger as it intermittently appeared between lily white cheeks (geeks don't like sun) prompted him to come up for air for a moment...
'Gently' he breathed, as Geeze probed further. It was common knowledge to the three of us that he liked to play with vibrating anal toys. We've got an advanced device on 'back order' for him via FUN-FIVE-0 trade account, so it came as no surprise to Geeze that his ass felt open and loose, easily able to accommodate a couple of fingers, which meant....
you know what I'm going to say.... the possibility of 'the real thing'. Still lightly fingering Iain, Geeze was able to reach for a condom from the trolley. We've got this medical style unit loaded with essentials, lubes, condoms, poppers, electroplay consumables and more. For special occasions and people we like, Geeze has some ultra fine condoms from EXS. They're called 'AIR-THIN' and they're the next best thing to bareback (something we NEVER DO). You see Minx really wanted Iain, and I really wanted him too....I truly felt the urge to GIVE, not only a good pounding but my seed too. Only later did I discover what that truly meant to him. For 'the now' I was content to 'see how far I could go' with two fingers, which turned out to be well in, then right in as Iain relaxed. I could feel his gland, & proceeded to massage it too; there were moans & groans of appreciation, while doing so I rubbered up using my free hand. I'm just shy of 7 inches when I'm really turned on, not really big by any means, but bigger than 75% of guys out there, and on the limits as far as anal fucking is concerned for most men. An ass is supposed to be able to dilate to a max of around 8cms, but that comes only with practise and heaps of time. BUGGERY is what it used to be called, and some of the Silent Generation & older Boomers still refer to it as that. Me & Minx refer to it as anal. A lot of 'straight' (wink wink) married men want it. Problem is, most of them know little about it, and even less on how to prepare for it physically or mentally. No such issues with Iain though... he trusted us. He was ready. Geeze eased in and paused, waiting for reaction. It didn't come, so he went in further. And deeper. Cock is bigger than two fingers, and some men struggle, but there was no resistance. Then deeper still until his body was pressed hard against Iain's. Ian's face and tongue too were planted just as firmly in Minx's sex. She was sighing & groaning now, in between expletives, a sure sign Iain was on target hitting her spot multiple times.

Geeze knows that 'jam in the sandwich' and 'spit roasting' is high on the lists of many men's desires. But it doesn't HAVE to be cock in ass, cock in pussy and/or sucking a cock, it can just as easily be what we were doing now. Iain was sexually engrossed in Minx. She was receiving pleasure, Iain was giving pleasure, what could be better than Ian giving AND receiving? Geeze was in the mood to GIVE, this was more than a mechanical fuck, it was verging on love making. Pushing in hard once more from a 'doggy position', Geeze straddled Iain's thighs, pumping his cock in and out of his hole. Reaching underneath him with one hand, he massaged the tip of Iain's cock at the same time; it was swollen and slimy with his precum. It meant Geeze could squeeze and knead to his heart's content without risk of causing injury, while still fucking Iain relentlessly.  Then transferring position to kneeling on one side and bending the other leg while on foot, he was able to go balls deep. Best of all, it enabled Geeze to watch himself in the big wall mirror, to see his aching balls taut, not swaying, but tight and round and leathery, like a cricket ball. Such a turn on! He had no problem straying hard. It was live porn. It excited me to the point of well, just GORGEOUS erotic fucking is all I can say! The condom offered little resistance, I could feel pretty much everything, and so could Iain I could tell. I can't remember his exact words, all I know is they spurred me on. 'I'm gonna cum, I'm going to fucking CUM' I shouted, ejaculating into the condom while thrusting hard, then pausing to let Iain feel me as I came more, several good bursts, before collapsing against his body & cupping Iain's breasts beneath with my hands. Amazingly he was STILL eating out Minx! 'That's so intense' he said.... Not quite knowing which part he meant, I asked him....'Those thirty seconds before you know the guys going to cum' he replied. I hadn't known that. But I know now. For next time and for other guys.

Sometimes with full on meetings, two players cum and one doesn't. If it's the client who's yet to climax, then rightly or wrongly we feel dutybound to keep going. Sometimes that's physically easier said than done. Some men deliberately prevent themselves from cumming in the early stages, then have a ton of trouble getting there later on, due to the intervention before. That's older men for you! (over 40's) Iain always books an hour and a half to two hours, so there's plenty of time. Conversation starts up, prosaic stuff interlaced with dirty talk, sexy talk, then it's a little play with the nipples, then Geeze will get hard again, prompting more interest from the client, that's often the way it goes. Turning to Iain, Minx asked 'Would you like to suck Geeze?'
'Yeah'
'What about a blindfold, ever been blindfolded Iain?
'Mmmm, bondage.... restraint, I like restraint.....'

I don't think he was referring to chains and rope but once the blindfold was on, things changed. Tossing away the leather mask, Geeze ventured 'What about a hood Iain? Ever tried a leather hood? Wanna try?

'Okay'

So it was on with a fairly serious gimp hood; it's laced up at the back, has a visor for the eyes, and a small opening for the mouth and nostrils. It goes with a ball gag, but we didn't offer that. Besides, his mouth needed to be open for cock. Once the hood was on, we'd deprived him of some of his senses. Sight 100%, sound around 50%. Extreme players use sound cancelling headphones so they're in complete silence. Some people that can never happen, because they suffer from tinnitus. I feel for those folk...they're living with NOISE 24/7. I can't even deal with noise from the neighbour's kid let alone constant ringing. Anyway, we got the green light for further restraint, which meant leather cuffs, professional grade, secured by chains. All the time we checked him, consent and all that...it was freely given. Only later did we discover the TRUTH, about where he was at the time. Cutting a long story we were venturing into the world of mindfuck. For some time we made him aware of what we could or might do, now he was helpless. Up until now it had been a kind of light hearted tie and tease situation. But then the true gravity of the scene hit home to him. Fact is, he was TOTALLY dependent on us as to when/or if we would set him free. You're probably thinking this is a bit OTT, but then you may never have been there. If we had a pound for everyone who laughed when they're told Minx works as a dominatrix, and they say...oh yeah...'you beat people up and knock them about' IE the layman's idea of BDSM, we'd be wealthy. It's not those things really, it's all about TRUST. And different practitioners use different methods & scenarios to foster that relationship, which may be fleeting, temporary or even permanent. Teasing the sub's lips and mouth with the bell end of my cock seemed to calm him. It must have taken his mind off 'What if....?' His cock started to harden again. Geeze ordered him to lick other areas, to take him over the top & induce yet another cum. Rimming did the trick...firming Geeze up & making him solid...'Are you ready subby?' 'You sure?' then 'Take that....'

Now he was wanking furiously as Geeze unloaded. 'Do you want Minx to wash it off?'
Minx shuffled herself into position over his hooded face, aiming her cunt at the hole in the mask for his mouth, creamed around the lips and leather with Geeze's sperm. Iain was taken aback & could no longer wank, so Geeze took matters in hand. Minx's close presence turned the sub on, as did the taste of spunk and her hot piss, as well as feeling Geeze work on his dick while simultaneously twisting his scrotum. It was a sensory overload for him. Geeze masturbated him firmly, concentrating his pressure on the areas he'd noticed were most sensitive from the big Doxy earlier.

'Permission to cum mistress, permission to cum, oooooghhhh ahhhhh please Mistress!' he whimpered.

'YES! Granted in full!'  He shot his load. An impressive fountain it was too. He'd only wanked the night before or so he said... but then sexy people are like that aren't they.

The meeting wound down, and there was talk about the usual stuff....he's a bit of a car nut, and an interesting chappy. I'd read an article earlier in the day about why corporations seem willing to loose customers by pandering to the woke brigade and ESG. It seemed particularly relevant because one of the company's Iain does work for insists on flying a truly massive LGBTQ flag outside their main UK plant...no other flags, just that one. It seems to fly against Common Sense. It's the same at Budweiser, and even our own UK 'Wickes' this weekend, angering most people, and making no sense to them. Until you learn about the true motives. I promised to email Iain a link, but had trouble finding it, so I emailed him an apology a couple of days later. That's when we got the feedback from the meeting.... I'll share some of it here... (some bits we've redacted to maintain anonymity)

Testimonial: Apologies for not replying right away. Thank you for yesterday, and introducing me to new adventures, something I've never tried before. The experience caused me to do a lot of introspection, going back to my teenage years, and it's led me to conclude that I've never truly trusted anybody in my life. Until yesterday, when I agreed to be *****************. I've always been self-reliant in most aspects, only asking for assistance if I'm left with no choice. [I'm like that too btw] One strong memory returned to me last night, which was the day I achieved *********************REDACTED****************************************************** I realised that if I didn't get everything exactly right, there was a strong chance I would be dead within eight minutes. That's a lot for a 17 year old to consider... Since that time, I've struggled to relinquish control. Yesterday was a big step for me. I'll admit, the experience alarmed me, even though I trusted you as much as it was possible for my anxiety to let me.

To hear you *******************REDACTED***************** made me realise how self-reliant I really was, and how few trustworthy friends I feel I have. **************************** and I thank you again for taking the time and care to introduce me to something way outside my experience and comfort zone. I will need time to figure out if I ever want to repeat the experience, for the reasons stated above, not because you were anything other than kind and careful with my helpless body. That said, I look forward to reading about Jerry's description of the day, if you choose to write it on your website. Did you go to the beach in the end, btw? [No we didn't :(] Iain x

Wow! Great feedback & good experience for us all. The next day things were very different. Talk about 'roller-coaster' of a life!  Geeze had a 70 year old booked in for 'spanking' and to explore his bi side. I'm, not going to waste time on the details, but the guy was a know all (he came from Essex) & rubbed me up seriously the wrong way from the start. Complaining about directions, parking awkwardly, criticizing the playroom and saying he wanted nothing to do with BDSM in any shape or form etc etc....

'You obviously know way more about this kinda thing than I do, You know what... you're best just take your money back and FUCK OFF' was what I told him [verbatim]

Shocking I know, and it's only happened a handful of times, but it served to pull me up. We routinely give 100% to our meetings, and put the clients first. I hadn't spoken to him on the phone beforehand! No excuse.  Should'a Could'a Would'a just don't cut it, My Bad. You live & learn dont'ya.  UGHHHHH! Until next time.. You subscribe to NEWS VIEWS AND SCREWS to learn more about our life as an Escort Couple. YOUR PLEASURE is OUR BUSINESS as we turn fantasy into reality. #WhatDreamsAreMadeOf! We tell you the way it is….and we thank you for your continued support. Until next time, take care, Luv, fun50couple xxx

Do stories like these turn you on? Are you one of those 'wishing'? All we share with you in NEWS VIEWS AND SCREWS is true*!  You, yes YOU, could be participating & enjoying scenarios like these a few short hours from now, anywhere in the UK. So, pick up the phone! Don't be shy. Call Minx TODAY or email us at support@fun50couple.com. See you soon!

Postscript: HERE IS the link to Joan Price's blog post about Sex & Ageism.

* Please note we NEVER divulge people’s identities and we have changed some names and details to preserve complete anonymity.

© fun50couple 2015-2022